Communication Is the Key

by Jean Luo

On July 17th, 2023, the transit Nodes officially changed their signs from Scorpio South Node to Libra South Node, and Taurus North Node to Aries North Node. The nodes are points of fate, and their shift into Aries and Libra places a universal emphasis on the axis of relationships, which speaks to themes of me and you, us and them, and in some instances, you against me (and vice versa). Thus, with the Nodes changing signs, over the next 18 months the theme of our focus in life will be shifting to relationships, whether it is personal or business, or personal and our role in the collective. Since the North Node of Aries is ruled by Mars, and South Node in Libra is ruled by Venus, it brings themes of independence and collaboration, action and compromise, aggression and harmony, anger and peace, masculine and feminine, and male and female.

The hardest learning and soul growth is playing out through all sorts of human relationships. Those whom we love and care for, and long to be loved or valued – our parents, partners, spouses, children, siblings, friends, etc. are often teaching us the hardest, even heartbreaking lessons. Because they are the dearest and closest people in our life, because they are our families, bloodlines, because we love them deeply and dearly with our heart, we expect them to understand us, support us, console us, and love us. When this is not so, we often get hurt with deep disappointment. Look around, many relationships were established out of love, but were dissolved and broken with the time due to lack of understanding and communication.

In the next 18 months, we are all going to, in one way or another, be facing our unresolved past life issues, patterns, habits, conditioning, and programming through our dealings with relationships in our lives. This will provide us opportunities to resolve outstanding relationship karma, release past life energies, and learn our chosen life lessons. Through our relationships, we are discovering what we are, what we truly want in our heart, how we can create a beautiful, loving, and happy relationship in our life.

One of the most important key factors in building a good relationship is communication. What we communicate and how we communicate can lead to positive results in relating to each other – unite, support, respect, peace and harmony, or to ‘negative’ consequences in relating to each other – misunderstanding, disconnection, conflict, fighting, dissension, division, and destruction. Furthermore, communication is one of the most important life lessons we have all chosen to learn from in our relationships with others. Even those who have chosen to be mute or deaf in this lifetime have lessons related to learning how to communicate through silence or using body language.

Communication includes expressing and listening. It is a two-way dialog. All conversation involves both speaking and listening. It is important that we learn to express ourselves honestly and truthfully from the heart so that we can be a true expression of ourselves. Unfortunately, now days, the human world has so many problems and the root cause is primarily due to lack of communication, or clear communication. The feelings and emotions are kept deep within, causing so much pain and agony, disappointment, and heartbreak due to not expressing and communicating with another or others.

The creator has given each of us the unique gift of freedom to speak and express ourselves. Thus, we have the freedom to use the gift to honor the creator’s creation. It is not what we say, but how we say it. When you say or express yourself, you need to speak and express your truth with love in your heart in a quiet and clear manner as you convey your intention with conviction, but without criticizing or judging another with ‘negative’ emotions. Let the other person know that this is your own truth, and you are not criticizing or judging. When you do so, your fear will dissipate, and you will gradually start to speak your truth more often. Indeed, the words you speak can be a very powerful tool of transformation and healing. If the person does not accept what you say, let it be, it is over. The most important thing is that you have spoken the truth. Make sure communication is clear in all you do.

Another important aspect of communication is listening. In our nowadays human society, we lack listening skills in the extreme – between countries, political parties, religions, leaders, media, news, family members, especially in individual relationships, etc. When we don’t listen to another, it fosters disrespect, and misunderstandings which leads to wasting energy by fighting over different opinions and beliefs, which lead to separation, dissension, breakup, and destruction. When others are speaking, talking, or expressing themselves, listen to them carefully and attentively. This shows them your genuine respect and treats them as equal human beings. Some people tend to be talkative and try all they can to get their voice to be heard or to convince others to believe their truth and their point of view, or even force others to believe their truth, but they never really listen to others – their truth, their feelings and their voice. Acknowledge and respect other people’s truth, although it is different from your truth. Acknowledge the other person’s point of view and allow them to speak their truth. If what they have said is not in agreement with your truth, simply detach from what they have said with respect and understanding. You do not need to agree, but you do need to listen and show them respect. If we do not agree with what has been said, just agree to disagree, and move on. There is no need to waste energy justifying yourself. Unfortunately, many of us tend to take other people’s speaking and expression personally. We tend to feel we are being criticized, judged or ridiculed. When we feel this way, we tend to fight back, either entering into endless justification or arguments about who is right and who is wrong.  If we can really listen and hear what another tries to say with respect, find a common ground to reach agreement, or agree to disagree with emotional detachment, a lot of unnecessary discord would be avoided.

Human relationships can be very complex and complicated once we allow our emotions to run their course. Thus, practicing emotional detachment and not taking what others say or do personally is very important. We need to keep reminding ourselves that often what the other person says or does is not meant to hurt us or disrespect us; it is just their way of dealing with their own emotions. In most situations, what we think, do, act, or react to is totally driven by our past mental and emotional energy that is trapped in our soul memory, and it has nothing to do with our current situation. Because we do not have the understanding and awareness, we simply allow our subconscious to control and manipulate us. Thus, if we can just listen and simply respect others for having their own truth and their own way of life and accept them as who they are and what they choose to be by giving them respect and acknowledgement, we can all work together and live together in peace and harmony.

Over the next 18 months we are being given a great opportunity for all of us to resolve unresolved relationships issues by embracing creative new ways of relating. Make sure communication is clear in all you do.