Starting A New Life
Moving to a faraway place
Since moving 250 miles away from my home county for the last 35 years, to Cornwall in the farthest South-Western point of England last October, and moving in to my new home on my birthday, it’s been an interesting six months of mixed emotions. I’m sure most people have been experiencing mixed emotions due to the world-wide pandemic, and the following are a few of my thoughts and experiences, with my spiritual practice as my main support.
Lockdown #1 had ended when I was still living in Surrey, restaurants had re-opened and I was seeing my friends openly again, so on the day I left with my son, we were planning to eat supper near the motel I’d booked two hours into our journey. However, we didn’t leave our old house until after 7pm and the restaurant had closed at 9 o’clock – just as, we arrived! Luckily, however, there was a convenience shop at the petrol/gas station and we were able to buy some snacks to see us through until the morning. (I say “we” because my son, Russell lives “at home” with me.)
We were up and away from the motel nice and early to meet my daughter, Frances, who has lived in Cornwall for the last six years having returned from a decade living in Sydney! We met up for my Birthday Breakfast at a lovely pub for a cooked Full English Breakfast. Frances handed me a gift and told me to “open this one first”. It contained a pretty “It’s My Birthday!” sash which I was instructed to “wear it all day!” So I dutifully obeyed and twelve hours’ later it had torn and was taped back together with brown packing tape! #Happy and #Exhausted!
Emotions and Expectations
Plans to build a new life for myself by joining groups, and yoga and meditation classes in my new hometown so I would meet like-minded people, and to start spiritual groups myself were all quickly put on hold in November when England was plunged into the a Lockdown Tier system, and then into full Lockdown again immediately after Christmas. I was so annoyed at that point! I was just about to have lunch with a group of women and it was cancelled and I am not a fan of Lockdown as it has been so detrimental to so many friends’ physical and mental health. I was #Angry!
My hopes and plans of spending frequent quality time with Frances were dashed because of Lockdown, and she discovered she was pregnant with her first baby only ten days after I moved, and she was confined to her quarters (spending a lot of time feeling nauseous!) and instead of shopping trips, business breakfast and lunches and long walks together, we have been communicating in much the same way as if I was still living 250 miles away back in Surrey! But, I have to admit, with a few more meetings than when she lived in Australia for ten years! I was #Frustrated!
However, I started attending the nearest Unitarian Church to me, in Plymouth, for their Sunday morning Zoom services and other evening meetings such as their lovely, contemplative Heart & Soul services and their more poetic and lively Congregational gatherings, which I have really enjoyed as I love poetry. I knew at some point I would have to move on from my previous Unitarian church in Surrey, who were also Zooming their Sunday services, but it happened sooner than I thought because I was drawn to meet local Unitarians. I’m only sorry I’m an hour and a half’s drive from Plymouth! Cornwall is a long county, so I was #Happy but #Undecided.
A Warm Welcome!
My 250 mile move has been eased by receiving a lovely warm welcome from both the Unitarians and from the St Austell & District Soroptimist International Women’s Club that I transferred to from my old Surrey Hills Club. But again, due to Lockdown, all meetings have been on Zoom and I am really missing the company of the women in person, especially like-minded women to form working friendships with. #Lonely.
However, I have been blessed with the friendship of a delightful 86 year old Soroptimist, Mary, who is a long-time Rambler/hiker and with Monty, her Bijon Frise, has been leading me down many country paths around the area. Mary is a retired Community Midwife and knows all the local country footpaths, and usually someone on every walk we go on! #Blessed!
Childhood Trauma
I was sent to boarding school when I was 7½ years old and often any sadness I feel goes back to my childhood experience and memories. But the mind-training course I’m studying, A Course in Miracles, explains the true cause of our sadness and any guilt is because subconsciously we think we’ve separated from our Source, which we haven’t. #Sadness.
Therefore, once this is realised, I will never feel lonely again, because we are One Mind. I’m also blessed with good friends in Surrey and beyond and a loving family – and all I have to do is pick up the phone to speak to them. Do you find that at low times we don’t feel like calling a friend? I do, but I find it really helps and we never know how much we might be cheering someone else up too! #Supported.
My Spiritual Practice
I’m blessed with having a strong spiritual practice of True Forgiveness which gives me peace of mind, but it doesn’t stop emotions coming up in the first place, and I get a lot of benefit at times of sadness and loneliness, (particularly when things haven’t worked out as I’d planned for my move!), and I’ve felt lonely despite having my family close by – one can’t help one’s emotions. I’ve even felt angry recently, which is quite a new emotion for me! #Blessed. #Sadness. #Loneliness. #Anger!
I have, however, learnt to acknowledge my emotions and try to understand what the cause of them is, beneath the immediate worldly reasons. Usually, the immediate reason is signalling a deeper meaning in our subconscious or from a past life, and once I’ve worked out what they are, I can then work on forgiving and releasing the emotion – i.e., healing the causes. #Understanding. #Release.
So, although my emotions have probably been more up and down since moving to Cornwall, (Lockdown in Surrey was not too awful because I knew the area and had local friends), I am blessed with being able to let God and them go! Thank God for Margaret, Maitreya, Jesus and his channel, Helen Schucman, and all my wonderful teachers. #Blessed! #Happy! #Thankful!
We are never alone.
With love, as ever
Jacquie
Jacquie Verbeek
www.jacquieverbeek.com