Compatibility & Conflict Report – Marriage & Romance

Romantic Compatibility and Conflict Report for

Margaret McElroy

and

Alan McElroy

Birth Data for Margaret McElroy:

Margaret McElroy

October 19, 1946

5:31 AM

Nottingham, England

Birth Data for Alan McElroy:

Alan McElroy

October 17, 1955

8:35 AM

Spokane, Washington

Maitreya.co

email: info@maitreya.co

    Your birth chart interpretation is based on the positions of the planets at the time of your birth. For the benefit of students of astrology, these positions, along with other technical information, are listed below:

Positions and Data for Margaret McElroy:

Sun      position is 25 deg. 14 min. of Libra

Moon     position is 16 deg. 30 min. of Leo

Mercury  position is 16 deg. 16 min. of Scorpio

Venus    position is  1 deg. 00 min. of Sagittarius

Mars     position is 16 deg. 51 min. of Scorpio

Jupiter  position is  5 deg. 02 min. of Scorpio

Saturn   position is  7 deg. 56 min. of Leo

Uranus   position is 21 deg. 36 min. of Gemini

Neptune  position is  8 deg. 59 min. of Libra

Pluto    position is 13 deg. 12 min. of Leo

Asc.     position is 12 deg. 55 min. of Libra

MC       position is 17 deg. 14 min. of Cancer

2nd cusp position is 11 deg. 04 min. of Scorpio

3rd cusp position is 10 deg. 01 min. of Sagittarius

5th cusp position is 16 deg. 26 min. of Aquarius

6th cusp position is 14 deg. 34 min. of Pisces

Tropical/KOCH   Standard time observed.   GMT: 05:31:00

Time Zone: 0 hours West.   Lat & Long: 52 N 58      1 W 10   

Positions and Data for Alan McElroy:

Sun      position is 23 deg. 32 min. of Libra

Moon     position is 15 deg. 05 min. of Scorpio

Mercury  position is 15 deg. 34 min. of Libra

Venus    position is  5 deg. 49 min. of Scorpio

Mars     position is  2 deg. 42 min. of Libra

Jupiter  position is 26 deg. 03 min. of Leo

Saturn   position is 20 deg. 17 min. of Scorpio

Uranus   position is  2 deg. 07 min. of Leo

Neptune  position is 27 deg. 49 min. of Libra

Pluto    position is 28 deg. 08 min. of Leo

Asc.     position is 18 deg. 59 min. of Scorpio

MC       position is  4 deg. 53 min. of Virgo

2nd cusp position is 14 deg. 33 min. of Sagittarius

3rd cusp position is 15 deg. 32 min. of Capricorn

5th cusp position is 29 deg. 38 min. of Pisces

6th cusp position is 24 deg. 23 min. of Aries

Tropical/KOCH   Standard time observed.   GMT: 16:35:00

Time Zone: 8 hours West.   Lat & Long: 47 N 39 32   117 W 25 30

Dear friends:

Welcome to the Compatibility and Conflict Report and the myriad ways of expressing the continual dance of life. This report is based on methods employed through years of working with couples, observing relationships and analyzing the lives of the famous and infamous. The contacts described within this program are certainly not all the combinations possible between two people. But they are the core patterns of relationship analysis that I begin with in determining areas of compatibility and potential conflict between two people. I analyze these basic points of contact to arrive at my interpretation of what is central for an enduring relationship or for one that teaches something of importance and leaves a lasting impression. Additional parts, patterns and interpretations will be added to this report in the future.

In many of the interpretations, I’ve described the highest potential that one can strive for with a particular combination. Yet it is only a potential and we are human and have complex emotions and contradictory issues and reactions at any given time in our lives. Use this report as a guideline to make your relationships as rewarding and fulfilling as you possibly can. And know that your relationships are simply mirroring your own soul’s struggles. Each relationship will fulfill something within you and challenge you to look at your shadow and transform yourself. Sometimes this means staying with a partner or a relationship and sometimes the learning process requires that you let the relationship go. These decisions are never easy and they should only be made after careful and truthful introspection, reflection and guidance. But ultimately, these decisions are yours and yours alone to make. Remember that variety is the spice of life and that although you may have some difficult areas of relating with a partner, it is in those areas that you can learn the most about yourself and others and grow in wisdom. It would be a mistake to look for a partner with whom you have no disagreements at all and this kind of relationship is a fantasy, rarely if ever, a reality.

Thank you for purchasing this report and I hope it is meaningful and useful to you.

Special thanks to John Flagg for unflagging editorial support.

To the mystery and magic of relationship chemistry,

Dorothy Oja

Copyright 2000

Chapter 1: Enjoyment, Closeness and Lasting Impressions

This section is based on the idea that there are three basic needs in every relationship:

  *  Interest, energy and stimulation or sexuality.

  *    Enjoyment,  abundance,  expansion  of  awareness  and  happiness.

  *  Patterns for commitment, consistency, teaching each other or reaffirming something essential one for the other and vice versa.

The sort between your charts is for eleven separate aspects that define energy, fun and lasting impressions between you. Most strong relationships have at least four to six of these aspects between their charts.

Alan McElroy’s Moon Conj Margaret McElroy’s Mars:

There is strong erotic and sensual energy in this aspect. It won’t take long for the two of you to feel an attraction for each other. Your quick responses toward each other will be very exciting at first. There is immediacy to this aspect and a certain volatility. Gradually however, you will find that you respond just as quickly to perceived negative expressions or habits in your partner. This can cause arguments. Because this aspect is geared toward confronting issues and especially feelings, you will need to learn to listen to each other and compromise. Striving for win-win in your conflicts will alleviate the need for one person to win and the other to lose . Guard against quick responses that hit below the belt or show a lack of respect for your partner. Because this pattern is prone to conflict, it is even more important that you learn to confront each other about problems or irritations in diplomatic ways. There will be no problem in being direct. Saying things in anger or going over the top one too many times will eventually damage the relationship you want to build or maintain. Being direct is one thing, being  aggressive and attacking is quite another. Let off steam on your own before you confront your partner about an issue. Because this aspect is quick to respond, it can also be quick to anger. If you find that you are losing your temper with your partner too often, you may need professional help to learn to manage conflict and to fight fair. This aspect has a delicate balance and can either maintain its exciting and stimulating energy or it can degenerate into habitual argumentativeness. Some sparring is part of this aspect and the opportunity for healthy, even heated debate is readily available. But be careful of harshness or impatience and causing permanent damage to your partnership.

Margaret McElroy’s Moon Square Alan McElroy’s Asc.:

This aspect requires that you explore the dynamic of emotion and action or that you are willing to act on the emotional needs required of your life together. One or both of you may have difficulty with excessive displays of emotion. When you are together and either of you is overly sensitive due to tiredness or any sort of stress, the expression of emotions can become extreme. Feelings seem to burst from either of you almost unexpectedly and in a flood. After one too many emotional outbursts, one or both of you may be reluctant to fully express yourself for fear of negative reactions from the other. Unmet needs will quickly become damaging to your relationship. There may be times that you feel out of sync with your partner and feel misunderstood or not properly acknowledged. This can be quite frustrating. To prevent unwanted and unwarranted dumping of emotions, make time regularly in your relationship life for the venting of emotions or simply set aside a time when you are calm, to process and discuss your emotional life. This tactic will prevent  feelings from being bottled up and reduce excessively emotional scenes or emotions expressed inappropriately.

Margaret McElroy’s Moon Square Alan McElroy’s Saturn:

This aspect is a binding one but has its share of struggles. The bond is one of a perceived (or real) responsibility toward each other. The two of you will have challenges and obstacles to overcome and obligations to shoulder. In fact, obstacles or burdens may prevent you from culminating your relationship long term or they can make your relationship stronger, as you face them together. Some of the struggles this aspect draws concern the balance or relationship between your past history, your families or divergent career and domestic needs. You could have different feelings or definitions about the roles each of you should assume within the structure of your relationship. Faithfully seeking to determine what the most important priorities are between the two of you will help you separate the real issues from non-essential ones. Sometimes what initially appears to be an issue is, upon deeper scrutiny, a non-issue. Trust and responsibility are key factors in the success or failure of your relationship. The main purpose of this energy pattern between you is to help you develop a greater understanding of  trustworthiness and reliability, exactly what that means, and where and how these concepts fit into your relationship life together.

Margaret McElroy’s Sun Sextile Alan McElroy’s Jupiter:

You have come together to experience large doses of joy, excitement, adventure, opportunity and optimism. Each of you will feel your lives opening up as a result of your relationship. Good will and positive thinking, provided you’ve done your research, will bring you many wonderful experiences. Because it will be easy for you to give of yourselves or your resources, you will need to choose carefully. Overextending yourselves is a real problem and can easily cause your joy and optimism  to come crashing down. You will desire travel and other types of learning and personally expanding experiences. Boredom is anathema, and so both of you will be on the alert for fun and enriching events or projects to pursue. Learning of many different types, philosophy and even participation in religious or spiritual rituals, will be key elements in your life together. A regular amount of physical activity is vital and will keep you healthy and your ideas prolific. There is a distinct desire for comfort and ease but if not balanced well could lead to laziness or procrastination. The challenge in this aspect is to maintain mental and physical health. Together, you will be more inclined to take a philosophical attitude toward life’s experiences and to gain from its richness and variety.

Alan McElroy’s Venus Conj Margaret McElroy’s Jupiter:

With Venus conjunct Jupiter, there’s a special affection between you and you enjoy each other’s company. You take pleasure in giving to each other. This is an aspect of genuine affection and can make up for other difficult aspects you may share. The message in this aspect is to open you up to your full potential of emotional expression while still taking into account the consequences. There is no expansion or expression without universal feedback, and this aspect teaches you responsibility for your use of energy, your own or other’s. There is a natural inclination to give freely and willingly to each other. Others will notice your enjoyment and want to share in your positive expression. You will draw social relationships toward you and participate in many social activities, if you so choose. Travel possibilities are likely, as well as a wide range of learning situations. You are drawn to any activities that expand possibilities and offer positive experiences. You seek a certain amount of variety and can tolerate a fair amount of risk-taking. Your over-optimism however, can be like wearing rose-colored glasses, and you’ll need to take them off now and then to deal with important practical realities of your life together.

Margaret McElroy’s Venus Square Alan McElroy’s Jupiter:

Essentially positive, expansive, generous and joyful, this aspect between your charts generates its share of exaggeration and excess if not handled carefully. This is the classic, “too much of a good thing”. The truth could be stretched or unnecessary risks taken with your resources or your affections. Guard against taking too much for granted, or you may easily lose something valuable to you Be careful of having too high expectations or promising more than you can truly give. Be aware of boasting and showing off, since it is likely to bring you the opposite of what you desire. The impulse is for betterment and supporting positive influences in your lives together but the compulsion in this aspect may be to get it all at once or immediately. Take the time to discern the experiences and influences that really matter to you and look at the long term, at least part of the time. The intent of the aspect is to make you aware of where you tend to be excessive and the consequences of that. There will always be a tendency to push the envelope a bit and it’s up to the two of you to decide when that’s in your best interest or not. A sport of some kind would be good outlet for your restless energies.

Margaret McElroy’s Mars Conj Alan McElroy’s Asc.:

The immediacy of this aspect can be stimulating or disconcerting. You either feel initially attracted, aroused or put off, depending on other factors in your individual charts. One of you may have a strong instant attraction to the other and begin an assertive pursuit on behalf of starting a relationship while the other enjoys being pursued. The intent of this combination of forces is to awaken you to take action on your own behalf. It stimulates self-assertion by challenging your sense of identity. Although this process is not always comfortable, it will get you moving, sometimes by raising your anger. Alan McElroy may find Margaret McElroy too aggressive for personal comfort and disagreements over what to do and how to do it can easily arise between you. Whatever the issues are, how one or both of you uses or misuses your energy, assertiveness or anger, will come up for review. Your relationship needs physical activity and newness but it can also generate impatience and selfishness. You will need to take turns fulfilling each other’s agendas. If one of you is always leading and calling the shots or determining the activities the two of you will participate in, the other will eventually rebel.

Chapter 2: Emotions and Communication Between You

These aspects detail the quality of the emotional connection and basic comfort between the two of you and your ease or difficulty in communicating, talking with each other and simply understanding where each of you is coming from. These aspects also describe how you reason together and resolve issues or problems.

Margaret McElroy’s Moon Square Alan McElroy’s Moon:

Although you are attracted to each other on many levels, your basic day-to-day habits are probably very different. You approach life’s mundane chores and happenings in ways that may not be clearly understood by your partner. Your feelings and responses can sometimes be confusing for the other person, as much as they care for you and want to understand. This can cause not only friction on a regular basis but also frustration for both of you. Your habits and peculiarities can grate on each other and be the cause of arguments and misunderstanding. If you care for each other, you will, with patience and willingness to compromise, resolve some of these differences. Still, you operate differently internally, which stems very much from your upbringing and how you responded to your early conditioning. These habits and predilections can be difficult to change, and you may simply have to accept the differences in each other. Discussing your feelings openly is a crucial part of this combination. There is a good chance that, once you really understand the emotions behind the attitude or habitual responses of your partner, greater tolerance will result. On the other hand, once your partner understands how you are affected by a particular response or habit, modifying the offending or annoying behavior is part of the compromise necessary for relationship harmony. This aspect definitely requires more tolerance, acceptance and willingness to allow for differences in mood and reaction. You have attracted this combination because you need to dig deeper into your habitual ways of responding and seek out the roots of your behavior by exploring your upbringing. There are many things you do that are unconscious and automatic, and contact with your partner will allow you to take a closer look, modify the negatives and also reaffirm your strongest feelings.

Alan McElroy’s Mercury in Libra, and Margaret McElroy’s is in Scorpio:

Although you are attracted to each other, there are times when one of you will have great difficulty in figuring out where the other is coming from and what she (or he) is trying to tell you. Your styles of communication can be very different. The premises upon which you base your reasoning or the logic you use will often perplex your partner. Especially if you have to decide on projects or activities together, your differences can quickly become an issue between you. Talking things through slowly, step by step, will help each of you to understand how the other arrived at his (or her) opinion or conclusion. This will take patience but in the end will be worth it. What’s more, by taking the time to really understand how your partner is thinking, you can not only learn something important about your partner but also get a different perspective yourself. You will also learn how your communication affects others, since your partner is probably not the only one who can’t always understand what you’re trying to say or figure out your logic. You’ve attracted this kind of relationship exactly for the purpose of fine tuning your thought processes and becoming more adept and flexible in the ways you have of communicating with others. This will be doubly useful if you are in a business that requires writing or regularly communicating with others.

Chapter 3: Fulfilling Each Other’s Partnerships Needs

These aspects explain how you meet each other’s desires and dreams in special partnerships and one-on-one relationships. These aspects are based on what your natal chart describes that you’re looking for in any major relational interaction.

Margaret McElroy’s Jupiter Conj Alan McElroy’s 7th house ruler, Venus:

Together, you expand each other’s options and offer opportunities and choices to enhance each other’s lives. Being together brings joyousness and you find you have more mutual benefits than you had before. You open new worlds for each other and you are easily generous with each other. You are likely to be so enthusiastic that you can easily go to extremes or overextend yourselves. Because of this it is important for you to consider the longer-range consequences of any important undertaking. For the most part, you will feel very positive in each other’s company and you will seek ways of growing and learning that suit your lifestyle and values. The intent of this aspect is to open your hearts fully, to express generosity, to seek experiences that teach wisdom, to encourage others to express themselves positively. Another important feature of this aspect is to teach you to distinguish between risks that are worth taking and those that are based on unreliable facts, not enough information or questionable motives.

Margaret McElroy’s Saturn Square Alan McElroy’s 7th house ruler, Venus:

You are together because you want a more serious relationship or you are learning what commitment means for you and what sort of promises you are ready and willing to make. As you get to know each other, you will feel a sense of something important between you or that you will learn things of importance from each other. Some might say there is a fated feeling or inevitability to the two of you meeting. It’s possible that you feel indebted to your partner or that you agree to commit to a project together that will take a great deal of your time and energy. Whatever the case, a strong sense of responsibility will be a part of your relationship to each other, for better or worse. Respect for one another is vital and it has to be a two way street. A lack of respect, a lack of support and judgment or criticism, real or perceived, will undermine the relationship quickly. Your social engagements tend to be selective and center on people who share a similar achievement level to yours. You value people who have experience in the field you’re interested in. Your best friends could be colleagues who understand the nature of your work. There is some tendency to exclusivity and closing off other potentially valuable relationships. The intent of this aspect is to define and strengthen your commitment to yourself, your primary interests and to your important and intimate relationships and to maintain a solid foundation for growth.

Alan McElroy’s Moon Conj Margaret McElroy’s 7th house ruler, Mars:

There is likely to be a quick and instantaneous reaction when you first meet. You will spark emotions that are exciting and stimulating or possibly irritating. The energy you generate together is challenging and you will feel the impetus to be active and pursue new initiatives or new activities together. You will want to take some risk and pursue some adventure. Your strongest challenges together, however, will be in the emotional arena. Be sure to listen to each other’s concerns and never discount the other’s feelings even though they may be much different than your own. The intent of this aspect is to bring emotions to the foreground. In other words, the two of you are meant to stimulate each other’s feelings. Because you can so easily incite each other’s sensitivities, it becomes doubly important for you to be careful. The last thing you want to do is to create a wasteland of bitterness between you. That will kill your relationship quickly. You can generate so much excitement together that sometimes it becomes anger. Learn to fight fair, seek win/win resolutions and appreciate your partner’s position. You can be sure of one thing, your relationship will not be boring.

Alan McElroy’s Saturn Conj Margaret McElroy’s 7th house ruler, Mars:

When you first meet, you will enjoy the sense of stability and competence you feel. However, in time, you could just as easily sense that your partner is competing with you or possibly wanting to control the action. Whatever the case, you will feel that there is something important happening between you and discovering exactly what that is will preoccupy your attention and keep you relating to each other in some way. This aspect challenges both of you to know your bottom line and determine when to stand firm and when to yield to pressure. You can expect some obstacles that will have to be negotiated and overcome. The intent of this aspect is to help you define the goals and actions that are most important for you to pursue. It will help you organize and structure your energy and bring disciplined or focused energy to bear. Making a commitment to a course of action and accepting the consequences of your decisions are another lesson this connection has to teach you. Once the two of you are in agreement, building the foundation of any project or pursuing any endeavor will bring out your strength, determination and desire for longevity.

Alan McElroy’s Asc. Conj Margaret McElroy’s 7th house ruler, Mars:

Somehow or another you’ll want your partner’s attention. Now what you do to get that attention is the question. The sense of immediacy is undeniable and you feel stimulated and energized in each other’s presence. The two of you will have no problem taking action when you are together. In fact, you are probably together because you both enjoy a great deal of physical activity and sports. If you are not inclined toward a sport, the restless energy that is not being released could turn to impatience or even angry fighting. Hint — it’s more difficult to have a fight while you are participating in a sports activity. Still, be aware that the quickness of this energy between you can mean that you say or do things without always thinking of the effect upon your partner and your relationship. Too much thoughtlessness or selfishness will damage your long-term relationship. The intent of this aspect is to motivate you to set goals and take real steps to achieving them. In your social group, the two of you are likely to be among the movers and the shakers, encouraging others to take part in whatever activity or project is happening. Being together will stimulate each of you to assert who you are and express yourselves more fully than you have previously.

Chapter 4: Your Closest Contacts, Your Strongest Themes

This section interprets the closest connections between your charts. The idea is that the closest ties explain the major or central themes of your relationships and the reason you have come together. The nature of these aspects will also define the main activities, interests and patterns that comprise your life together.

Notice that in this section each paragraph contains both the easier expression of energies as well as the more challenging ones. Both interpretations are included because these close connections pertain to the central learning curve of your relationship. Based on the premise that the more exact the connection (also the closest energetic contact) between your pair of planets, the more psychologically significant the aspect will be for each of you. This means that you are likely to be strongly influenced by each other in the areas described. Because of this, it will be useful to consider both the easier and more challenging interpretations even though you lead with one of them. You will, from time to time and in various circumstances, probably exhibit some elements of each group, both the easier expressions as well as the more challenging ones. Another thing — it’s possible with both types of aspects that you will have the same challenges but simply respond or react to them in different ways. The goal is to rise to the best possible expression of each combination. This is the learning curve and this bestows wisdom.

Margaret McElroy’s Jupiter Trine Alan McElroy’s 4th house cusp (easier aspect):

If this is the most exact aspect between your charts, your main relationship theme is to reach high and strive to attain your most important dreams. Learning, adventure and wisdom are what you seek.

Easier aspects: A clear aim, strong skills and a positive attitude will allow you to reach your goals every time. You are generally easygoing with each other and understanding of changes in schedules and tempo, because your lives are filled with many extra activities through work and at home. You are each other’s best coaches and support each other’s projects. People consider you lucky, but you know it’s a matter of being prepared and when opportunity knocks, being willing to take the risk for what you want in spite of your fears.

Challenging aspects: You have great courage and enthusiasm, but, at times, that very same energy makes you overdo it. Be sure you are centered, that your motives are clean and you’ve taken the time to take aim for your goal. Keep remembering that you are a team and you’ll curb your competitiveness with each other. Dissipation or overindulgence will dull your edge. Scattering your energies among too many projects can diffuse your influence. Keep bragging to a minimum and keep your eye s on the prize that’s worth your efforts.

Alan McElroy’s Venus Conj Margaret McElroy’s Jupiter:

If this is the most exact aspect between your charts, your main relationship theme is to experience good fortune and affection in your relationships. There is luck that comes with this combination, including the ability to get what you need when you want it.

Challenging aspects:  Your nature is generous and giving, but budgeting your resources is not your strong suit. The desire for instant gratification crops up regularly and you will need to deal with it effectively. Some things are worth waiting for, believe it or not! You have a tendency to risk with high stakes or expectations and your disappointments can be large. Learning to do the research and curb impetuousness will save you grief. If you exaggerate or make false claims, you’re likely to gain a bad reputation. Your negative issues arise mostly from overdoing or overspending in one way or another. In spite of it all, you manage to laugh about your escapades and also find some wisdom.

Easier aspects:  Your energy together exudes goodwill and generosity, and others will respond positively toward you. Your love and affection begets love and affection. You will always have what you need and your faith is strong. Financially too, you will be abundant. There is a tendency to overdo, over-care and overspend yourselves and resources but if you have it to spend, it’s your choice. You may find others jealous of your good fortunes in spite of your generosity, but that’s their problem.

Margaret McElroy’s Sun Sextile Alan McElroy’s Jupiter (easier aspect):

If this is the most exact aspect between your charts, your main relationship theme will be to expand your learning or experience, take advantage of life’s opportunities and, as the poet says, “To catch the joy as it flies.” You will want the good things of life in whatever way you define them and you are willing to take certain risks in order to reach those ends. You will seek adventure and fun with a gregarious, generous nature.

Easier aspects: Many opportunities will come your way, and people will call you lucky. However, very often it is your consistent generosity of spirit or resources that brings people into your camp and opens doors for you when you need it. It will be all too easy for you to go to excesses from time to time or to spend too freely, whether it’s your time or resources. You will seek a certain amount of ease and luxury in your life but seem to have enough wisdom to use it in balance.

Challenging aspects: In your desire to attain your goals you can make unwise choices. Take the time to look at the opportunities you have and make sure they are sound and will deliver what is promised. At the same time, it will be necessary for you to keep your promises and refrain from overextending yourselves financially or energetically, since this is an aspect of excess. Be careful of indulging in grandiosity or splashy shows of extravagance. Instead, seek worthwhile experiences and those that will lead you closer to your goals and to a sense of wisdom. Balance taking with giving.

Margaret McElroy’s Moon Sextile Alan McElroy’s Mercury (easier aspect):

If this is the most exact aspect between your charts, your main relationship themes are emotional and mental communication and having a network of friends. You will communicate intuitively and will enjoy discussing your feelings. You tend to be honest and matter-of-fact about the state of your emotions.

Easier aspects:  It’s very possible that you will find yourselves talking endlessly about many different topics. Your relationship is healthier when you have a free flow of communication and emotional release. You will enjoy being around others who like to speak freely and often on many different topics. It’s possible that at least one of you is a writer or teacher or has a career in communications.

Challenging aspects:  There are times, no matter how hard you try, that you will simply talk past each other and fail to understand what the other person is trying to communicate. This can be extremely frustrating. Take your time, breathe and keep trying to state things in different ways until you find that your partner understands what you mean. Fortunately, you have the impetus to want to communicate, so with some trial-and-error you will find the way.